(2016) The whole process of transcribing these diaries has brought about the most remarkable, series of personal events.
When I began this process, I was suffering from a terrible malaise, a depression. I felt in the wrong place’, ‘living the wrong dream’, terribly unsatisfied and was consumed by feelings of self-hatred. I had an awful habit of over thinking everything and having identified that I was, possibly, a Highly Sensitive Person, I spent more time observing what destabilised me/when and discovered that I am probably not ‘loosing it’ at all, just needed to strengthen my belief in myself. The problems did not always lie in my corner and who did I think I was even assuming that they were!?
A serious of truly improbable revelations led me with the intensity of a steam roller back in the direction of meditation.
By re-living my Asian adventures, transcribing these ‘notes’ little sparks were ignited.
I signed up for an 8 week, non-secular mindfulness course, with the intention of learning how it was taught and becoming a mindfulness instructor. Quite quickly I realized that the experience I was having, outside of the religious constructs I had previously experimented within and at this point in my life, was very different from my previous, youthful attempts. By exploring this practice again and doing it I am suceeding in reversing the general trend toward negativity in myself and seeing immpressive consequences of this in my private life!
A friend recently commented to me “Well…I am very happy you are feeling so empowered!”The ‘process’ of re-living my diaries became a bit dry, so I have begun another blog, Rolling Ohm , in order to share the more present, random musings